I've decided that, with my before bedtime cup of Earl Grey, I am allowed one to four Lorna Doone cookies.I think four are only 140 calories. I've got room for that! I think.
Also, I always thought he was definitely a top five rapper of all-time, but the more I listen to him the more I think that Nas might be the best ever.
"Yo, I wonder if Langston Hughes and Alex Haley got blazed before they told stories?" I do, too, Nas, I do, too. Regardless, I'm glad you do because your flow be dope.
Speaking of rap and Nas, wanna know why 50 Cent thinks Nas is "not hot right now"? It's because Nas reads too many books!
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
An Amendment to My Diet
Posted by David at 5:09 PM
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Oprah sez: No food two hours before bedtime!
It's harder to do than it seems. Oprah's new "friend," Dr. Oz, says that we get a little hungry right before bed because we're going to start using the fat stored in our bodies for sleep. Hence, as long as you don't eat anything when the hunger comes on, you lose weight while you sleep.
But DAAAAAAMN -- them Lorna Doone cookies are DEEEEEELICIOUS!
Well, generally speaking, I drink my tea and eat my Lorna Doone's around 9:00-9:30 p.m., depending on how long it takes the tea to cool. That shit boils, you know! Then I sit on my bed looking at stupid things on the Internet, desperately fighting the devil who is constantly encouraging me to touch myself. Then I turn off my computer and read a book. Then I put the book away and close my eyes.Later, I sit up, grab my computer, turn it on, and furiously masturbate to extremely disturbing pornography. Around 5:30 a.m. I usually fall asleep, exhausted and ashamed, choking on tears.
So, I think I'm good on the snacks before bed thing.
This Dr. Oz shit has cost me many a late night Reese's peanut butter cup.
I'm with Dave, especially on the parts about masturbation (but not the ones where actually resists the urge, just the ones where stifles his urge to growl like a climaxing cheetah to the point that's it's little more than a choked, moist, soft groan, immediately followed intense self-disappointment with the fact that he just jizzed all over the last of the clean shirts that he'll actually wear).
One of my good friends and I have an ongoing argument about whether God's Son is better than It was Written. I think God's Son is underrated. The first song on the album blew me away.
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