I went from being in a pretty decent mood to feeling like I'm going to vomit depressing sayings all over chest in a sort of vomit-covered magnetic poetry way in a matter of seconds. I feel terrible. God, this sucks. I don't want to have to get up in the morning. I will never get to sleep tonight, I'll just toss around. Fuck. This is so fucking stupid. I'm angry at myself for feeling this way. All I want to do is lay on the floor and drink. That's terrible. I don't want to feel like this.
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
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It was the wierdest thing but, last time I felt like that I forced my self to get onto an elliptical machine for 30 minutes, then I went and picked up a huge container of Massaman Stew from this Thai place, and I didn't even want to think about eating, and I forced myself to eat a bunch of it. Then I puked and fell asleep. When I woke up I was running at %100. I'm not saying this is what you should do, it just worked for me.
Yeah, I'm not going to do that, but thanks for the advice. I'm not entirely sure what I'm going to do. Get drunk, I guess. Maybe go to a doctor. Maybe. Something like that.
What the hell is going on? Why are we upset?
I feel like I've been floating in an abyss lately, but the abyss is my couch.
Listen to Horus. Massaman can work wonders. Especially the curry kind.
I started denying reality again on Friday, so I'm okay again. And drunk.
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